Pfizer Exec Talks to His Doctor, Despite Restraining Order

During his 17 years of employment with pharmaceutical giant Pfizer, Solmon Ficsher revolutionized the patient-doctor relationship. It was in 1990 when Ficsher, now 47, introduced the concept of talking to your doctor without a specific reason. "Before Solmon, people only made doctor appointments when they were ill, injured, or in pain." says George Wizman, senior analyst at Pharmacological Data Systems. "Back then, people just didn't understand that physicians have plenty of extra time for vague chit-chat that will ultimately lead to an unnecessary prescription,” Wizman continued, “Solmon Ficsher had the foresight to realize America’s population was a renewable resource of undiagnosed disease. That was his ‘aha!’ moment,” recounted Wizman. That moment, according to Wizman, was when Fischer first coined the phrase which every drug company banks on: “Talk to your doctor.” Americans have been heavily medicated for superfluous and invented ailments ever since—a much-needed boon to a flagging industry.

Trouble followed success. Despite his contributions to the explosive profit pharmaceuticals enjoyed in the 1990s, too much of a good thing began crack the veneer of a man in his prime. Fischer took his catch-phrase seriously, amassing an impressive list of needless prescriptions to some of the industry’s most powerful drugs. But it wasn’t the drugs Fischer was after. The conversation was the reward. Fischer’s attorney says it was the doctors who let him down. “My client did what every intelligent American should do—he talked to his doctor. He talked about everything; hobbies, religion, weather patterns, online gaming communities, you know, typical doctor-patient fare.”

But some say Fischer went too far when he ran out of things to talk about. Lively banter was replaced with repeat subject matter and awkward silence. Still, he scheduled his appointments. It wasn’t long before doctors across New London went out of their way to avoid him. “I had an elaborate system of signals in place for my office staff to warn me when Mr. Fischer would come in,” admits Dr. Uri Valrupa. “I prescribed everything I could get my hands on, but he kept coming back for the conversation. It was totally awkward. I was very uncomfortable with the lack of interesting topics,” Dr. Valrupa continued, “I knew he hit rock-bottom when he asked me how many types of paper bedcovers there are. That was just sad.”

Dr. Valrupa joined a legal-action group against Fischer in November, 2006. He and 17 other physicians obtained personal protection orders restricting Fischer’s contact. But in December, Ficsher was arrested for violating the order by attempting to strike up friendly conversation with several of the doctor’s as they were leaving work. He was quoted, “I want to talk to my doctor. I need to talk to my doctor.” Officials at Pfizer have declined to comment, but inside sources say there is an experimental medication already in the works that is said to limit the brain’s capacity for nonessential conversation.